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Most Obvious Press Release Of 2013: Biker Chicks Sexier Than Pedestrians

In a misallocation of funds Harley-Davidson recently spent an untold buttload of money proving something men have known for years: That women who ride motorcycles are sexier and better between the sheets than women who don’t ride. Common responses from male motorcyclists to the press release were: Duh; Tell me something I didn’t already know; Can I be a recruiter? Meant to entice non-riding females into the Harley-Davidson army by pimping the Bar & Shield’s website, www.h-d.com/women, the press release was peppered with effeminate catchphrases such as “physical intimacy, “communication,” and “improves relationships” but the basal message is one of female motorcyclists being sexier, happier and more confident than their non-riding counterparts.

2011 Indy Mile Cancelled

Indy Mile officials have decided to cancel this year’s AMA Flat Track round due to the continuing investigation into the fatal stage rigging accident at the Indiana State Fair. The Aug. 13 tragedy killed five people and injured dozens after winds reaching as high as 70 mph caused the stage to collapse.

Fundraising Harley Prints By 8-year-old MDA Ambassador On Sale

MDA Ambassador Reagan Imhoff wanted the artwork she created with Harley-Davidson designer Mathew Hintz to “raise a lot of money for MDA so we can have more scientists to make medicines.” The original drawing of a purple Harley-Davidson Softail Breakout motorcycle brought in $3500 on August 31 at the MDA auction during the 110th Anniversary Celebration. The pair hopes to raise even more with sales of the limited edition, signed prints, available through www.HintzStudios.com. “I’m happy our artwork raised some money, and hope we sell all of the prints!” said Reagan, who has Spinal Muscular Atrophy, a painful neuromuscular disease.